he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
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