stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
