Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize