Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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