btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
