my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
