One girl and one boy is just not enough.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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