Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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