Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
