Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
