Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
