So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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