Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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