Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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