Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
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