'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
