We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
