Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
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