Texts From Last Night

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  (517): View more from Michigan

  They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."

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  (517): They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what." http://tfl.nu/ufo0
  Replies (3) Good night (1994) Bad night (592)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess

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  (603): i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess http://tfl.nu/ousq
  Replies (24) Good night (948) Bad night (2695)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  It's like God shit irony all over that family

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  (703): It's like God shit irony all over that family http://tfl.nu/i9ev
  Replies (45) Good night (2616) Bad night (924)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.

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  (757): I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour. http://tfl.nu/8whx
  Replies (16) Good night (4546) Bad night (885)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.

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  (215): distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard. http://tfl.nu/840x
  Replies (36) Good night (4312) Bad night (1886)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.

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  (330): She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay. http://tfl.nu/hfdj
  Replies (19) Good night (10742) Bad night (1345)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.

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  (610): I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible. http://tfl.nu/74be
  Replies (9) Good night (4306) Bad night (1000)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.

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  (512): I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings. http://tfl.nu/0ge6
  Replies (10) Good night (2531) Bad night (1742)
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  (818): View more from California

  Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.

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  (818): Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse. http://tfl.nu/0n19
  Replies (18) Good night (3480) Bad night (980)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.

  (1-815): View more from Illinois

  Best Friends For Life.

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  (815): You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub. (1-815): Best Friends For Life. http://tfl.nu/ev62
  Replies (7) Good night (3497) Bad night (676)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..

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  (501): Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him.. http://tfl.nu/3vco
  Replies (7) Good night (1656) Bad night (602)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game

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  (509): Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game http://tfl.nu/0fm6
  Replies (3) Good night (1054) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.

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  (662): IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol. http://tfl.nu/ywt6
  Replies (1) Good night (1061) Bad night (612)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?

  (1+61): View more from

  Mobile recharge?

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  (+61): What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls? (1+61): Mobile recharge? http://tfl.nu/wf5a
  Replies (2) Good night (980) Bad night (367)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  You're the horniest male I have ever encountered

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.

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  (334): You're the horniest male I have ever encountered (404): Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you. http://tfl.nu/3v94
  Replies (2) Good night (841) Bad night (335)

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