But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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