So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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