Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
