Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize