You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
