marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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