No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
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you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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