Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
