It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
