I like my sex mixed with concussions.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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