What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
it hurts more in the daytime
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
