i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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