You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
