I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize