Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize