what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize