The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
