Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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