??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
A+ Viking dick
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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