Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
