I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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