he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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