Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug