Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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