EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Randomize
