It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
