sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
