Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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