with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
