please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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