You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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