So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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