you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
