why didn't you poke me back
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize